Archives for August 2018

Yes Folks . . .

Until . . . September the 5th.  Y’all know we can’t stay away from you guys for too long! Peace until we meet again.

Hey fam,

Well, I’m going to stay off of politics for today. That man is too exhausting. Anywho, did y’all hear about the bride that canceled her wedding? The main reason is that she can’t afford it.

Now let’s break this down. She said since her and her fiancé have had a storybook romance they wanted a fairytale wedding. They saved $15,000 for their wedding (that’s great). Then they went to some psychic to help them decide which venue they should use. Really, you needed a psychic to help with a decision of what you could afford? Well, first off you shouldn’t have spent money on that psychic. And even though you couldn’t afford it you figured it would be a good thing to ask your wedding guest pay you $1,500 (so a couple would have to pay $3,000) to help pay and attend your wedding. Girl, you must be smoking some of that marijuana that dangs near killed those people in New Haven.

Royalty-Free Stock Photography by Rubberball

She had the nerve to be shocked that only 8 people responded to her invite and sent them money. My guess is that was their parents and grandparents. Then they did a “GoFundMe” page and only received $250. Still not understanding why other people aren’t kicking in for her wedding. She went off on her maid of honor who said she was giving $5,000 and didn’t. Since they’re running into all these issues, her fiancé suggested going to Vegas. Then she went off on him.

I don’t know how old this bride is but she never learned the saying “You can’t always get what you want”. Apparently, she’s never been told “No”. For her to think that it’s normal to ask for other people to pay for her things is outrageous. One good thing came out of this, I bet her ex is happy to realize how he dodged a bullet.

Hey fam,

Well, it’s Monday and Jax got me good. This morning he had his breakfast and went out. Usually, he goes out and waits for me on the front stoop. Well, today he wasn’t there. I called out for him and no response. No little head peeking around the corner. No galloping towards me. No wagging happy tail.

I hopped in the truck and drove around the neighborhood looking for him. Calling out “Jaxxy Jax!!” “Here Pup-pup” and whistling (not good but hey I tried). I made several passes around and then went back to the house. Walking the backyard thinking maybe he blended in so I checked by all the bushes. Nothing. I sat back on the stoop where I prayed and thanked Jesus for Jax’s safe return.

Well now comes the time I had to tell my Mom about her fur-child was still missing. Tell her that I was just coming back in to get something to drink and keep it moving. Just as I entered into her room, I see Jax’s little peanut head pop up. I was never soo excited to see him. Mom said he’s been home for a long time. She said he came into her room with wet paws and wanted to get up on the bed. She talked about how he changed sleeping positions. We figured out that our neighbor let Jax in while I was looking for him. If I had only walked in the house after I walked around it wouldn’t have taken as long. I’ve also learned to just put lil’ bro on his leash before letting him out.

Wooaah excuse me. This dog is just waking up from late morning nap. But hey it is my day! It’s National Dog Day! This is day when we get our celebration on. This brother gets to be in charge of errythang. For instance, when we go for a ride, I ride in the front. Music-well you know I’ve got my mixtape on a CD. I don’t use pm3 playas or whatever those things are called. Anyway, it’s all loaded up.

Actually, no music is fine, just wanna feel the wind on my face. The other thang I get to do is… squirrel. Be right back.
Sorry ‘bout that. This squirrel was messin’ wit me. Of course, he won. It’s not fair. Squirrels always find a tree. But I was close. Wait until next time. Imma get him. But when I finished chasing, I picked up a scent. So I followed it. Ohh I jus wanted to roll in it. And that’s what dis brotha did. I rolled and rolled. Then I did my best move where I start with my nose and slide. I do it that way so it gets all ova a brotha.

Well Imma go take a lil nap so I can do my other stuff. Plus I think Imma end up gettin’ a bath later to get this smell off me. My sista hasn’t seen me yet. Oh yeah there was one thing I was gonna tell ya about. With us doggies having flu issues, celebrate national Dog day by making an appointment to make sure your fur-friend is protected.

Hey fam,

I have to talk to you about another yummy for the tummy. I already told you about the Cotton Candy Grapes that taste just like it. Well, now I’m going to tell you about the “Gum Drop Grapes”. They are from the same company, Grapery. OMG, they are right on time grapes. It tastes like a gumdrop with the burst of sweetness. However, it also has the feeling you get when you bite into it but without that sticky feeling on your teeth.

Don’t worry fam, these aren’t GMO’s. There done the old fashion way. Remember in science class we talked about how farmers changed their crops? If you don’t know, it’s grafting. So there are no chemicals being used here.

Fam, make sure you check your produce area for these tasty grapes. It may be located near organic fruit. I promise you that once you taste them it will bring you back to your childhood. For an extra treat freeze them for those extra hot day. Well, I’m on my way to buy some more. We just finished them.